The Your Stories section is all about you! Please take a minute to tell visitors of the ILGA website about what LGBTI life is like in reality. Please submit your personal story and share your experience!
I am a documentary filmmaker, gay, and have just completed a film called STRAIGHT LINE CURVE. It showcases seven successful gay men of the USA Southwest who do not fit the stereotypes often associated with homosexuality. Each man has a high profile and is fulfilled, optimistic, inspirational and proud.
I believe this film offers the world a wonderful and motivational look at the gay journey, which few people in the general populace knows exists...but it does! This 32-minute film is available on DVD.
Ed Breeding, Las Cruces, New Mexico, USA
email: breeding4051@comcast.net
www.ed-breeding.artistwebsites.com
Very interesting film depicting the passing of same-sex marriage legislation within London and the UK in 2013. Worth a look!! http://youtu.be/NZaBse2hrQU
where ours orthodox norms crushing us, ours cruel stereotypes suffocating us since centuries the LGBT compaign is a hope for the people like me to breath at will but on it positive senses......like me i am an mphil qualified person . From a prestigious university of islamabad city with thirty years of age i do not have any job because i looks gay.... Evn i am not....and evn if i am so should i not have right to earn my livelyhood?
We need change we need help....we need this revolution.
It is good that you are initiated some activities to know the realities of LGBTIQ issues in Nepal but I am sad to say that this is not relevant since 90% of LGBTIQ are computer illiterate and rest do not give a damn about LGBTIQ activism.
My recent research on LGBTIQ findings shows that Blue diamond society who is working towards HIV/AIDS has failed in number of ways;
1. it has hardly done anything to raise awareness about HIV/AIDS,
2. The staff members are too busy falsifying services given about HIV/AIDS awareness, treatment and prevention and research.
3. BDS has successful trafficked transgender people from around the Nepal into sex trade which has caused heavy budget to bile out illegal sex workers from the police,
4. BDS supports this because Sunil Babu Pant ( president of blue diamond society) as misued these community for his benefit including becoming a CA member 2008-2012.
5. BDS has mis-infromed international activists about HIV/AIDS status of LGBTIQ people to secure further funding.
6. 99% of LGBTIQ people neither trust BDS nor visits BDS to take any service because of its corrupt leadership.
7. Even 90% staff of BDS hates its key leader of BDS and leadership but unable to raise the voice simply because of fear of losing job and livelihood ( they are neither qualified to do anything apart from working here for tokenism)
8. BDS has focused its activities on unnecessary projects which raises more hype (internationally) than impact.
9. BDS recruits its key staff not based on merit but on his (sunil Babu Pant) link so that he can manipulated further international activist and donors,
10 Any news or research came from the orgnisation is 99% fulsified which is not related to the field stories and issues.
11. I can challenge and prove that HIV/AIDS data represented by BDS is untrue.
11. The government not willing to renew the organization not because the government of Nepal is homophobic because our government have enough evidence of corruption, misused, Human rights abuse and falsification occurring at the current leadership.
12. Sunil Babu Pant is powerful because he has formed sexual relationship with powerful people like Peter O' Neal and other UN staff who can not be challenged by average people.
This is all for this I will update further later when I have time.
john, if you want to see homophobias then let invite you to my country cameroon where i live.
you certainly will be served.
if you are interested then let me know through this same forum and we will exchange ids and get to venture together
witing to read from you as soon as received.
fleur
hi ilga,i will not like to be identified.
i am a caameroonian, female i have always had difficulties in sharing my identity for fear of repraisals. but since i grew older i have developed some courage which makes me express my views without fear or favour. but about my sexual orientation, i am receiving alot of discrimination of recent. it is affecting my job as a journalist. something very complecated to manage. i sometimes am compelled to think of going on exile but, how do i do it? i realy wish i would feel free in my nature and interact with others normally, why not find someone to love and live with. but i don't know how to go about it. can someone help me please...
in my country cameroon there is alot of discrimination towards people of complicated nature like gays, lesbians... i was last week witness to a humiliating confrontation visa vis a gay who openly dmitted his sexual orientation. i felt bad but sad to note that somoany cameroonians are in asimilar situation but do nothave the courage to declare. others areforced into marraige which ends up being a lifetime uneasiness.
but i will not like to do something forcfully but, i don't know how to go about it...
I left the UK in 2011, to travel around the world with my civil partner, we are still on the road and there is no end to our journey. I must say we have not experienced any hate crimes or homophobia on our trip so far. You can see the countries we visited and follow our journey around the world at our travel blog http://flashpackatforty.com/
I am in process of sorting out some rather complicated info about my past, I came across some records (surgical) of mine that refer to some info that is typical to males, I am female (though these surgeries where when I was very young) and a mother of one (biological was pregnant and carried to term) Both myself and my daughter have some pretty big health issues in terms of my pelvic formation and my daughter has some issues that appear to have started in utero as a result of my shape, I delivered naturally (with epidural freezing) and the birth was quite traumatic for both of us, we have had very little success with doctors, and family disclosing information or solutions. I am feeling like we need to have the support of a community of people that not only understand more on this subject, but can offer suggestions of where to find good people who can and will help, with legal, medical advocacy.
Why is being yourself so wrong? Lesbian, gay, bisexual, straight, and transgender will always find love no matter how much it is hated upon. You are you, I am me, and everyone is who they are, not what they choose. Is our society really that crooked that its thought of as a choice and we can be "saved" because its not a choice, we don't want or need to be saved. We are happy the way we are. I can honestly say I live and love that I am lesbian. I have been me through all the crap I have been put through. I lost a relationship with my mother, that one person you so desparately want to understand and be there for you no matter what. She wasn't there for me. She hated that I was and will always be lesbian. It hurts to lose someone, but It kills to lose your very own mother. I move forward though because I know that I need to make my life MY life. We will always have those people who won't understand, but if we stand together and never stop fighting for our rights and own love they can't do anything to stop us. We will be the ones sleeping comfortably at night.
Hi everybody, i dont know how to explain da situation here ,day after day i feel losing hope in life and feeling really destroyed.
I present myself, my name is EMy "nickname", born in 1985 and I live in Morocco, a Muslim country where there is no gay rights at all, we are now in 2012 and there is any homosexual law reform expected !!
Since i was teenager i always felt that my choices and my way of thinking is like a girl, I dressed as a woman (in privacy) and so far I shaved all my body parts regularly .. in recent years I did my eyebrows and I tried to wear feminine clothes .. but i was firmly confronted by my family and entourage and I lost my job and all my friends just because i tryed to be me.
I avoided having homosexual relationship just because the law is not tolerant;
My life is wasted; prisoner in men clothes I find no taste to continue this life, get outside my room and see the world, nobody understands me, it's taboo to talk about homosexuality here coz of religion beliefs !! I lost hope to live and I swear i start to think about suicide.
I tryed several times to contact many gay rights comitee in several countries but in vain, they all told me that i have to be in that country in ordre to deal with me, i was seeking for a humain asylum.
My relationship with my surroundings have become worse especially with my family, and one day I'll leave home without knowing where to go.
i need some one to help me to live my life in a country where there is gay rights, I want to live and work in peace, get dressed with respect and freely.
my email: bi.cool@live.com -sincerly-
Hi Madam/Sir,
My name is Sageer Shahzad.I came from Pakistan to UK as a International
Student September 2010.My College status is now suspended and i am overstay in UK.
November 2012 i came into Civil Partnership with my current partner.Marriage Register office
Manchester UK issued us Civil Partnership Certificate as well.We are gay.
My partner belong to Poland and i belong to Pakistan.
Could you guide me how can i apply and what are requirements.
i am overstay since 31 October 2011 in UK.
We register our Civil Partnership Gay Relation 3rd November.(Ceremony)
In Pakistan there is a death risk for gays.
So help me
Thanks
Shaz Manchester
To whom it may concern.
We, aware people of Polish society are writing to you, looking for help with our national issue. Last few days have shown us that Polish government and some politicians cannot see all of public needs, which especially nowadays become very necessary. On Thursday and then on Friday, January 25 and 26 in our Seym took place a reading and also voting about Civil Partnership Act. To our surprise, the law made by the ruling party have not only been implemented, but also denied even the right to be the subject of the debate. This prompted us to take matters into our own hands and seek help from LGBT organizations in the world and among the foreign media.
From the beginning - it was the first time in Poland, when this kind of social problem was analyzed in the parliament. To the Polish Seym were given three projects of acts, which could change life of thousands LGBT people in this country, but it would be helpful for lots of heterosexual people, living in partnerships as well. But all projects had to face themselves as rejected. Why? Because of personal opinions, poor knowledge, biases, and hate of our politicians, what they have been showing since anyone had the audacity to say something about homosexual people law. One day before voting took place a debate, which was straight signal how our representatives of the authorities (do not) care about society.
The main argument to reject all of the three acts was that, it is allegedly inconsistent with polish constitution, especially 18th article, which exactly says: Marriage as relationship of one man, and one woman, family, maternity and parenthood are protected by Poland. But why Civil Partnership is disobeying this act? Answer for this question was given by Krytyna Pawłowicz (one of our politicians, party: Prawo I Sprawiedliwość): ‘From homosexual relationships we cannot expect prolongation of existence, because they are not geared to procreation. Homosexuals are completely useless, because they do not any procreation.’ What does it mean? We should not allow infertile people to get married, because they bring no procreation, and should be canceled from society. What is scary that politicians can say such things as these without any trouble during debates about law important for many people in our country. Mrs. Pawłowicz was asked by one reporter that, what would she do, if her son had told her, he is gay. She said, she would bring him for the therapy, because psychiatrists can cure it, and such a trouble must be cured! (in fact, there is no doctor after medical studies, who would try to cure homosexuals). And it was told to Mrs. Pawłowicz, that The World Health Organization stopped regarding homosexuality as a disease many years ago, but she replied, they are against people, and they lie, so she will never listen to them. In the day of voting she said again that the projects are the attack on the family, marriage and the Constitution.
However, article 2nd says that Poland is democratic country, existing with all rules of the social justice. So where is the justice here? Article 32nd : ‘All the people in Poland are equal’. So why some of them cannot legalized their relationship? In this case the lack of Civil Partnership Law is disobeying the Constitution!
‘Homoerotic relationships (whatever it means) in all their unnaturalness are just the expression of hedonism, and they are nothing good for Poland’ said Tadeusz Woźniak (party: Solidarna Polska). And he said such thing straight before voting.
Next politician voting for leaving all the acts before works have been started was Tomasz Latos. He said that being gay is only about to pray for changing that “awful situation”, and if someone has no faith in God, should just keep himself in hope, that it is going to change. In fact, there is no scientifically confirmed episode of changing sexual orientation. Politicians can lie, and talk whatever they want, without any consequences!
And people as them, with no knowledge, with no competences to talk about homosexual people, and full of biases (religion, society, upbringing, and manners) are allowed to decide about people for whom Civil Partnership is only way to have better life. Without it two people after twenty years of being together are totally strangers to each other in law. So they have no possibility to get information about the partner in hospital, in the case of death, they cannot decide about funeral of the partner, inheritance is like for strangers so partner will get his part of property, but with the biggest tax. There is also no possibility to get life annuity after partner’s death, and no chance to have common property(if they live together, the house belongs to only one of them. So when owner-in-law dies, his partner is forced to pay for this house if his partner gave it to him in his testament. If not his family(parents for example), can tell him to move out, and he has no chance to stay there because in law it is not his house.).
But it is not the only problem for Homosexuals. There are many Heterosexual pairs for which Civil Partnership would be helpful. For example when two people are in love but they do not want to get married and also want to live together with protection in many cases. This can also bring some help for friends, when they live together (in the other side of country, far away from hometown), and take care of each other. They could use this law to have easier life. To pay taxes for home together, get information in the hospitals, as close first contact.
This is a great solution for all the people who live together, but cannot, or just don’t want to get married.
We decided to write to you because we cannot stand this horrible way of treating our social problems as ‘way of hiding things that have a real matter’, how it was said in parliament three days ago. Talking in our country is going to change nothing. Please publicize this fact in your country. We are full of hope, that you might help just a bit or at least will not let members of the Government talk something unreal, wrongful, and prejudicial things without any consequences.
Your faithfully,
Konrad Kwiecień
Krzysztof Piszczek
International Summer School
In July 2013, We are going to be running for the 4th year, our International Summer School 8-13th July 2013. In previous years we've had people from Brazil, Colombia, Croatia, Denmark, Eire, Hungary, Italy, Latvia, Poland, Portugal, Scotland, Serbia, Singapore, Spain, Thailand, Turkey, USA.
The five day non-residential course will be held in central London and is aimed at counsellors and psychologists and others engaged in mental health support work across the world who wish to update themselves in contemporary thinking around work with LGBT people.
Places are strictly limited and early application is advised as we expect this course to be filled up quickly. We welcome people of all genders and sexual orientations from across the World.
Full details are on our website http://www.pinktherapy.com/Training/tabid/82/ctl/ViewCourse/mid/422/CourseId/118/language/en-GB/Default.aspx
Pink Therapy is the UK's largest independent specialist therapy training organisation and has been running for 14 years. Our website hosts the Directory of Pink Therapists an online database of LGBT friendly counsellors/psychotherapists. We welcome therapists overseas who wish to list their practices advertising with us. We also have an extensive KNOWLEDGE base of recommended books and articles. and an International Library of some of our most recent papers have been translated by a team of volunteers into most of the world's major languages and you can download them for free here:
http://www.pinktherapy.com/en-gb/knowledge/translations.aspx
Though law does not expressly condone same sex marriage and/or relationships between women, it does expressly make it illegal for men and have also been used on a couple of occasions to harass lesbians in Zimbabwe. It is usually used as a political campaigning tool by politicians, despite the fact that a lot of politicians are in fact gay. a number of times people have been victimised for being lesbians and deemed worse that commercial sex workers. Families force women into marriage because they fear being in turn victimised by society for harbouring gay people or merely being related to lesbians. A number of women have been displaced from home and have often been left stranded by families who have found out about their sexuality and unfortunately some have turned into sex workers for survival. a lot have not been trained, educated or supported by family and the society at large for being gay and some even lost their jobs. Because there is no law protecting lesbians, there is no protection against such harassment and person embarassment. i was arrested, beaten, lost my job, and family threw me out after finding out about my sexuality.
mario
(user currently living in COLOMBIA)
posted for
gay
readers
to the
BOLIVIA
country page
on 03/01/2013
tagged with lgbt families
I lost my job and respect of my collegues, because I dare to say I was gay, I tried to build my life in other city but because my job is done only by heteros, my reputation was in the ground everywhere, even my family turn its back to me. I had to start a new life as an iligal in argentina then colombia, but my title is not recognized there, and had to prostituite my self to survive, I dont know what to do in the future.
SOS NEED URGENT HELP!!!
Everyone has the right to happiness and to be free to live their own lives. But for every moment of happiness there is a price to be paid. We are Anna and Anya, a gay couple, one of us was born in the UK + the other from Russia. In July of this year, we fell deeply in love, when we met in Athens, Greece. We decided from that moment we will always be together, but we were not prepared for what lies ahead. Since one of our nationalities is British, we decided we would apply for a UK visa and go back together to England to start a family. But the UK visa was denied. It was a terrible blow and shock to us. In ordet to make a new application for a UK visa, we have to wait after 6 months from date of refusal. In Greece, we could not stay because Anyas visa in Greece was due to expire. Since Anna ( who'd from UK) has dual citizenship by birth and family is Greek Cypriot from Cyprus, we decided to go there. In Cyprus, we are faced with new challenges related to the fact that only one of us is European. Cyprus is in a very homophobic Country where Gays face persecution beatings and being killed. Also the Global crisis has hit badly here and the Cypriots are losing their jobs every day, shops offices and factories closing every minute. We tried many different ways past few months, but in vain asthere is no work here for locals let alone foreigners. According to the law of Cyprus, to have a job you need to have a work permit. A work permit can only be obtained from the employer, another vicious circle. However, if we were a heterosexual couple, or had gay rights marraige and equality here then this problem, would not have arisen for us. We could get married, and Anna and I would have the opportunity to live and work in Cyprus. To date, we morally, psychologically and financially exhausted. Because of the inequality of rights, to be together, we are forced to move from country to country, as if we are outcasts. We now have only 6 days left in Cyprus. After 6 days, the visa expires (for Russians visa-free entry is for 3 months). We are now desperate and an urgently need to leave this country. We cannot go to England, because Anya didn't get a UK visa. We cannot go to Russia, because there is the terrible laws for gays and human rights there, which are viruslly non-existent. We recently learned that Argentina is the only country where marriages between foreigners and Gays are allowed. This is our only chance now! So we decided to go to Brazil as it's next door and we have friend there and then to marry in Argentina, to increase our chances for a UK visa in March as they cannot refuse us if we are married as they do have some equal rights there. If we don't leave Cyprus on 20th December, Anya will be blacklisted and this will affect all future European visa applications especially the one we need to eventually live in the UK! But sadly we now have no funds to leave this country, as we have 2 Euros left. Friends and family have helped as much as they could, but we are not out to everyone we know being Russian and Greek Orthodox being Gay is the worst sin against our religion! We have tried everything we can to raise funds to leave here and have now realized it is time to tell the world and the public about our situation. As we desperately need help! We have both helped so many people in our past and are owed monies we cannot collect, we wanted to borrow it but have been let down, so now we are on our knees and need all the help we can get! We really need money to buy tickets to Brazil and the means of life for the first time. This is not such a big amount, but it affects our future. As Christmas is the season of good we are praying for an act or acts of kindness and a miracle so we can spend this Christmas and the rest of our lives together! We hope that in this big wide world there is someone for whom the two people, (women) who love each other and want to be together mean something. It's time to find out if anyone really cares and if anyone is prepared to help us!!! Please... Please... please... Support us!
We are grateful for any help and support!!!
contact us
Tel:00357 96491327
Email: annamkyr@gmail.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/sosgayrights
Twitter: https://twitter.com/SOSGayRights
Hi, my name is adi(not my real name) and i'm from indonesia.(sorry if my english sounds weird and bad grammar) Well this is my life story.
i live in a democratic country, indonesia. most of foreign people said that indonesia is a friendly gay country, but that's not true, i know there is no laws against gay in here but we have community law which our society looks don't care about gay people in indonesia but they keep away from gays and talking quietly behind, they think that gay is disease and disgusting, even worse.
how can i became gay?? it's all about my past, when i was kid, about 5 years old, a man who i think i can trust abuse me sexually, i don't know that's a wrong thing to do because i was just a kid( but i still remember about the incident, when he locked me in a room in the kindergarten school, and he did that. and when i was 12, my older cousin rape me, he threatened me, my heart can still feel the pain. i never tell anyone about this humiliating secret.
i live in a muslim conservative family, i never told anyone about my sexual orientation especially my father, if he knew about it, he wouldn't hesitate to kill me because being gay is the worst thing, so sinful, so it's obligatory to kill gay people like me. feel sad, but there's nothing i can do.
I will never be able to feel love and be loved. many people think that gay just need penis,sex. but we should deserve love too, if i have a choice: i can love and have him, but we both must cut off our penis, then i'll choose it, love is blind, but sex isn't.
i've last thing to do in my life, i will coming out to my family, i don't care if they hate me or want to kill me, though after it i'll end my life
because i can't live without love, "pefedict?" yes, but you don't know what pain i have, all this time.
they can say all they want about us tg to be honest they can point and stare at us all we have to do is ignore them and hold our heads high and walk tall . same for l,g,bs ignore the comments no matter what people say hold your haeds high and walk tall . eventually it will stop because they will get bored .
Angelo Prado, un joven que el 31 de octubre de 2012, fue víctima de un crimen de odio motivado por su orientación sexual, actualmente está recluido en el Hospital Central de Maracay. Según información del último reporte médico, las quemaduras alcanzaron el 30% de su cuerpo y se encuentra estable.
Angelo está consciente, lo que le permitió comunicarse con su madre y decirle el nombre de sus agresores, el pide justicia y se pregunta por qué le hicieron eso. Por otro lado, la madre llevará el caso hasta las últimas consecuencias. No más impunidad a los crímenes de odio.
ENTREVISTA A RONNY ORTEGA, EN SOLIDARIDAD CON ANGELO PRADO
Ronny Ortega, una mujer que lideriza el movimiento por la Diversidad a través del grupo Género Diversidad del Gran Polo Patriótico, hace un llamado a que paren los crímenes de odio que han estado ocurriendo en el Estado Aragua y en especial en el Municipio Linares Alcántara. Ella pide a las autoridades que este crimen no quede impune.
ENTREVISTA A AIDA PRADO, MADRE DE ANGELO PRADO
La Señora Aida Prado, madre de nuestro compañero Angelo Prado, quien fue víctima de un Crimen de Odio motivado por su orientación sexual y quien se encuentra recluido en el Hospital Central de Maracay, exige que se haga justicia con su hijo, que los jóvenes que cometieron tal atrocidad paguen por este delito, que no quede impune. También hace un llamado a la Defensoría del Pueblo, CICPC y todos aquellos organismos competentes para que se hagan cargo del caso.
ENTREVISTA A RICARDO RODRIGUEZ, TIO DE ANGELO PRADO
El Señor Ricardo ha estado incansablemente al lado de su sobrino y exige justicia por el crimen de odio cometido contra este joven de tan sólo 18 años. Además pide que las personas investiguen sobre lo que es la orientación sexual y aprendan a respetar a todas las personas
ESCUCHA LA ENTREVISTA http://goo.gl/HBg75
This is a decisive moment for the human rights about all of us. The person who is the guardian of the human rights is terrible. He is a homophobic, transphobic and misogynistic. This is a history about a lawyer, he is gay, and he worked in the proctor general office, http://tinyurl.com/c5qtcur . We need your help because the next year the LGBT people will not have rights. The next year the LGBT people no will exist more in colombia, because the goverment have fear about the power of the proctor.
We need your help and prevent to the proctor Alejandro Ordo単ez will be re-elected in this charge.
More information:
https://www.google.com.co/search?source=ig&rlz;=&q;=Alejandro+Ordo%C3%B1ez+LGBT
That's so sad. Don't take your life though, I found great love when I gave mine to Jesus. He is for you too. Live for Him and He will give you hope. Don't take your life. You are too valuble.
i wish that the LGBT community come to our country (Kuwait) bec. we really need help and we need some people to understand us bec. we're being hated by our friends and family and goverment and everyone when we tell them the truth and we can't show our love relationship to the people that's why we're keep hiding our true feeling so we can live a nice life with people around us !
I just want to know how to get married with my boy (?)
We both want badly to get married with each other, but we are in Morocco, and this is totally illegal...
I want your advices, your opinions. It's not only an impulsion or a crazy dream; we seriously want to marry. It's a life decision.
I can move to europe without problems, I work on cinĂŠma theater and music, I will be in Belgium (Wallonie) from october 10th for a project, so if somebody can help us realizing this or just leading us to an association specialized on this, contact me on pynhassjill@gmail.com
Hi, I'm Turkish and a lesbian and it really bothers me to see others of my ethnicity act like this towards the LGBT community. I have to wait at least 2 more years until I can even tell my parents about my sexuality...my girlfriend's mom already knows about her sexuality and all of my friends know that we're together, except for my parents. It's just not right when you can't go to your parents for help. They're your PARENTS. They're supposed to have your back no matter what you're like. Your parents are supposed to love you no matter what...what if that prosecutor had a gay child? Would he arrest his own child or beat him or something of the like? It's just unbelievable how homophobic someone can be...I recently watched a Turkish movie called Zenne Dancer that was made as a tribute to a gay man who was killed by his own father for being gay. We need to get some in the closet homosexuals into the Turkish government...
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Hello,
I'm in need of help . My husband and I are married in Germany . I'm an American and he is German . We got married in Germany and now being that I'm a
Department of defense commissary agency  employee ( i work for the usa army europe ) It has come time for me return to the USA . I can not get a green card for him due to DOMA . It all started march 18, 2011 my husband and I got married then 8 day later I was told by my grocery manager that I wouldn't be given an over seas tour extension, no reason was given and after talking to the store deputy ( who I told about my problem in detail) he said that he was told that a reason doesn't need to be given to me. I have made 2 EEO complaints dealing with discrimination and harassment. Because Deca ( commissary ) refused to. Help me in my problem . I was told that it was my fault for marrying a local national ( my husband is German) I should have thought about the consiquences before hand. Since then I have been fired while on sick leave . While fighting to keep my family together and to get my job back I still suffer from my work related sickness . I wait for help from any legal group willing to help us . My email is centilyen@yahoo.com
We are looking for some help. Since we started the adoption program 4 years ago we cannot find our way...
So this is our story:
Frederic and I get married in March 2008. Before our wedding we were already talking about adopting one or two children. So after getting married we started the Belgian adoption program.
We had to follow 4 seminars. All people who wants to adopt have to pay and to follow those seminars. After it you have to choose between the national (domestic) adoption and the international adoption.
We choose the national adoption. So we had had the different interview with the coordinator, the psychologist and the social workers. After a year of meetings they told us to try to move to the international adoption program because of the waiting list that was very long. There were already 30 couples waiting and only one child adopted on the last 2 years. Also because we are living in the French speaking part of Belgium so we can only adopt in Brussels and the French part. Not in the Flemish part, so are the Belgian laws... Just to let you know my mum is French speaker and my dad is Flemish speaker. Since I am a little boy I speak both languages...
Listening the coordinator we move to the international program! We had to do again all the meetings with the psychologist and the social workers because it was not the same department... After more than one year, we had to past the judgment at the tribunal. Only a judge of the Tribunal can give the right to a couple if the report is accepted and if he think everything is ok. We received this right directly. So we started to look for an association who would work with a gay married couple. We did not found it in Belgium!
In the same time we had have contact with Circle Surrogacy to know a little bit more about the surrogate mothers. But until now we are thinking that it is buying a child and not having a baby just because of the price of this program. We respect the price because it is normal but it is really too expencive for us.
So we started to introduce us as a foster family. After 9 months of contact with their social workers and psychologist. They said that it was not good to introduce a "problematic child" as they said into our family because we did not have other children.
So today we have no ideas anymore and we cannot find our way. We have all the rights and we cannot get through it!
Thanks to take the time to think about our request, we really need some help.
A person named Ishwor, the resident of Biratnagar-5 came to know that he belonged to the third gender community .But his family members were unaware. So, he was afraid and hesitated to disclose his sexuality among his family members. The main problem was there was no appropriate environment to disclose his sexuality. Later he became regular clients of Pariwartanshil Samaj and finally he decided to get help from Pariwartanshil Samaj, the organization working for LGBTI to disclose his sexuality with his family members and community as well. After that Pariwartanshil Samaj sent 1 outreach and 1 counsellor along with him in his home. At home, staff briefed on his sexuality and his human rights and at the end, the counselling part played a great role to accept him and his sexuality.
Now he is living freely without any hesitation of being third gender and also he has been supported by his family members and treated like the others members.
Wuist
(user currently living in FRANCE)
posted for
gay
readers
to the
KAZAKHSTAN
country page
on 19/04/2012
tagged with lgbt families
Dear all
My Company is about to propose me a great job in Russia (Project Director in the infrastructure / transport business). I would like to get there as an expatriate with my boyfriend. Do you know if my boyfriend can follow me or how he can follow me or where to find information ?
Please note that we have a French Partnership (called PACS) together.
Thanks for your help
Note: It is getting seriously hard to do the job you like (Project Management of International Infrastructure Projects) as borders are often closed to family members of gay workers.
My Company is about to propose me a great job in Russia (Project Director in the infrastructure / transport business). I would like to get there as an expatriate with my boyfriend. Do you know if my boyfriend can follow me or how he can follow me or where to find information ?
Please note that we have a French Partnership (called PACS) together.
Thanks for your help
Note: It is getting seriously hard to do the job you like (Project Management of International Infrastructure Projects) as borders are often closed to family members of gay workers.
My partner and I had a baby last year by IVF afterwhich we completed all the necessary forms to register our little girl and to obtain a birth certificate with both our names stated as her parents. It has now been five and a half months and to date our child has not been registered and we have not received a birth certificate for her...the excuse I keep hearing from the Department of Home Affairs is that to print a birth certificate for a child born into a same sex marriage requires them to re-set the IT system and to change the words mother and father to parent 1 and parent 2....I am so incredibly frustrated that we are yet again discrimintated against because of an outdated IT system and red tape!
i always wanted to tell my story but never knew how. so here goes nothing.
my name is ismael vera jr. i was born and raised in new york. in Brooklyn. i am 21 now. i am gay Hispanic guy. my story had many story's. from the boy who was homeless because he was gay. to in high school drama. to bad relationship. to wanting to do it all to not doing anything. i just want a chance to some one to hear me out.
i am very nice. funny. out going. laid back guy. who likes to do many different things and always looking to try something new. but one thing is holding me back is that i never got to finish high school. when i started high school. it was great i loved to learn and loved school. my sister graduated from that school and my little sister came in after me. but my older sister was the only one who got to graduate. but my little sister and i had a little secret. i knew i was gay since i was little i use to mess with my cousin when i was younger. i always was into men. i was OK with my self. i got picked on in school but it didn't bother me as much as what was going on at home. i remember when i got a phone call from a teacher who i use to talk to. and that my mother had called the school demanding for me to come home. she said to me that she said that she read something of mine and that i was sick. from that i knew what she had found out for i use to write in my journal and my mother always looked though my things. i was so scared to go home that day. my mother is very religious. i remember going home and she asked me to read her my journal out load to her. she mad my sisters read it to her for she could not understand what i was writing. after that it was hell. she use to throw my cloths out. she threw out my books everything i had. i could not go out, have friends. watch tv. or anything. i would spend most of my time in my room. working out. she use to beat me and my sister. we fought a lot. i remember wanting to kill my self many times but was scared to go to hell. my mother hit my sister really bad once that she went to school and someone called ACS. my sister took the chance to leave. i was scared to leave. even though my mother did all that i couldn't do that, but i was just so tired and didn't want to live there any more. so i went with my sister. it was a scary thing going though ACS and foster care. its not what it seems. in court. i went back home in terms i would work.
my mother never let me work for she did not want to me become independent. she didn't even let me get my state id. i remember not going to school and stealing my social secretary card and my documents from my mother so i can get my state id. when got my first check for 260. if i remember right my mother went crazy. and said i got paid to much. she did not want me to work. i never understood why until she took me to this place. she where they gave her money because i was a premature child and got SSI. she use to tell me to act like i couldn't read. she did not tell them i was working. when they found out my, and my mother had to pay them back she was upset and said i had to pay back a lot of money. she hated that i was gay and that my sister left with foster care and blamed on me. i went home one day and she threw everything out. i was 18 and i could not go back to foster care. so i was in my last year of high school and need 3 credits to graduate. i was leaving from house to house. in trains. in a stockroom of a mall. i got a job and i started to go to programs for gay youth i got in. but i had to get a job and i just wanted to have my own place. so i got more work. i moved from program to program. i was modeling, go go dancing. working at 2 jobs and working for the census at the time and i couldn't do school. i didn't sleep. so i stop going. my school helped me as much as they can.
at one point in high school it was like the movie "mean girls". but things got bad. i remember my friend punching the mirror in the boys bathroom because of something and cops caking him aways. it was bad at one point. i went from a no body. to knowing everybody in high school. and at the end. i was by my self.
i was very stupid for not graduating. i really wish i could go back and do things over. now i am with my boyfriend in Italy for a month and i am going to try to get my GED in new york. i just wanted to tell my story. it gets better.
We'd like to share a variety of experinces articulated in Digital Stories on the www.rainbowfamilytree.com project! Let us know what you think about sharing everyday stories for social change ; )
We are a gay couple from Holland. Living now in Portugal for 5 years. We were very happy to know that Portugal legalized same sex marriages. Since we are officially partnership registrated in Holland,( that was the legal way before it was called marriage) we thought it would be accepted as a legal marriage in Portugal.
NO WAY.
If we want to have are marriage accepted,( with all the legal rights) we first have to divorce ( with the loss of all legal rights we had so far) and than get remarried in Portugal.
Thank you Europe for accepting eachothers laws!!
Hi.. good day
I'am Brian 20 y/0 gay male i reside in Philippines iam a college student taking up the course nursing actually iam a graduating this coming march. my mom is a plain housewife and my dad is a seaman…. And because my dad is a seaman most of the time he is not at home and we used to met once a year I have my little brother he is 10 year younger to me. When I was still a child I spent most of my time with our relatives and because of the absence of a fathers figure my mom is always there to fulfill all the attention that my dad didn’t gave to me because he is too far from us because of his work. Until at my age of 7 y/o I’ve discovered already myself That I’am a gay and because of my fear to be discriminated or abused I’ve decided to hide my gender to my family but my mom already knows that I’ am a gay because when I was still a baby I suffered from the disease known as hemorrhagic disease of the newborn where in the baby has a low platelet count and because of that condition the baby will star to vomit a blood and have a nosebleed until the baby dies. The only thing to manage this disease is to have a blood transfusion. I was a type B positive that time a B positive is very very difficult to find because of that problem My god mother took the floor she offered her blood because she was a B positive blood type and after the transfusion the doctor talk to my mom and she explained to my mom that your son may have a possibility to be a gay when he grown up because of the blood that we transfused is a blood of a woman and not from a man and after that conversation may mom explained my situation to my daddy and my daddy accepted and understand my situation deeply in to his heart. As time goes by after I graduated my high school and I’ve entered college when I’ve become a 17 y/o my mom and my dad approved me and its ok to them that I become a gay. You know what the feeling of being free and accepted of your family and relatives is one of the most happiest feeling in your life that is the reason why iam so blessed because in behalf of my choosen gender god gave me the opportunity to be loved by my family. And I hope that all of the LGBT who will read my story of my life will be inspired and I hope that they will not surrender because I belive as a LGBT we are all have the rights to be loved, accepted by our family, community and by the world that we are standing in so I hope that we are all fight for our rights especially the approval of same sex marriage we must unite for our future LGBT for them to have a good future without discrimination but having and equalization…
Just Published: "An Orphan No More...the true story of a boy" written by Jerry and Jordan Windle. Jordan is Jerry's 13 year old son. Adopted from Cambodia when he was only 18 months old. Jordan is now the youngest Diver to qualify (at age 12) for the USA Diving Olympic Team Trials in Seattle, Washington. Order this wonderful Children's Book with the foreword written by 4-time Olympic Diving Gold Medalist, Greg Louganis. www.anorphannomore.com or www.jordanwindle.com
This story celebrates the ideal that Love is Love!
Cast the Last Stone
or
I Got Your Civil Union Hangin’
Do you take this man and this woman
Do you take this woman and man
To love and to honor and cherish
The way only a good Christian can
Will you throw a few stones at the heathens
Will you tell ‘em all where they can go
Will you hate everyone who’s not like you
For the Bible tells you it’s so
Or will you listen to that old hippy Jesus
Who said Leave all the bullshit behind
And let two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Enjoy all the love they can find
{chorus}
I’ve always loved you
And you’ve always loved me
You’d think love would be easy
In the land of the free
In a world full of bitterness
Hatred
And stone
Why don’t you leave all the lovers alone?
The love police say we can’t marry
The thought police say we can’t think
While the lawmakers locked in the closet
Say we can’t watch them buy the boys drinks
I love you like your soul is my soul
I’ll stay till the end of the world
But the minister ran from the altar
When he found we’re a couple of girls
Tradition can be a real mother
Those weren’t cruise ships in the triangle trade
And the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Know it’s time to make history fade
{chorus}
Money is nice if it’s decent
And handy when push comes to shove
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Know everything’s lost without love
They say Jesus he died for the sinners
And he fought so that true love will win
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Were told they should read the small print
Charlie Manson can legally marry
Any woman that’ll give him the time
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Were told that their love is a crime
{chorus}
Yeah, Charlie Manson can legally marry
Any woman that’ll give him the time
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
THEY KNOW THAT THEIR LOVE IS SUBLIME
Cast the Last Stone
or
I Got Your Civil Union Hangin’
Do you take this man and this woman
Do you take this woman and man
To love and to honor and cherish
The way only a good Christian can
Will you throw a few stones at the heathens
Will you tell ‘em all where they can go
Will you hate everyone who’s not like you
For the Bible tells you it’s so
Or will you listen to that old hippy Jesus
Who said Leave all the bullshit behind
And let two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Enjoy all the love they can find
{chorus}
I’ve always loved you
And you’ve always loved me
You’d think love would be easy
In the land of the free
In a world full of bitterness
Hatred
And stone
Why don’t you leave all the lovers alone?
The love police say we can’t marry
The thought police say we can’t think
While the lawmakers locked in the closet
Say we can’t watch them buy the boys drinks
I love you like your soul is my soul
I’ll stay till the end of the world
But the minister ran from the altar
When he found we’re a couple of girls
Tradition can be a real mother
Those weren’t cruise ships in the triangle trade
And the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Know it’s time to make history fade
{chorus} Charlie Manson can legally marry
Any woman that’ll give him the time
Money is nice if it’s decent But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
And handy when push comes to shove Were told that their love is a crime
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Know everything’s lost without love {chorus}
They say Jesus he died for the sinners Yeah, Charlie Manson can legally marry
And he fought so that true love will win Any woman that’ll give him the time
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Were told they should read the small print THEY KNOW THAT THEIR LOVE IS SUBLIME
Cast the Last Stone
or
I Got Your Civil Union Hangin’
Do you take this man and this woman
Do you take this woman and man
To love and to honor and cherish
The way only a good Christian can
Will you throw a few stones at the heathens
Will you tell ‘em all where they can go
Will you hate everyone who’s not like you
For the Bible tells you it’s so
Or will you listen to that old hippy Jesus
Who said Leave all the bullshit behind
And let two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Enjoy all the love they can find
{chorus}
I’ve always loved you
And you’ve always loved me
You’d think love would be easy
In the land of the free
In a world full of bitterness
Hatred
And stone
Why don’t you leave all the lovers alone?
The love police say we can’t marry
The thought police say we can’t think
While the lawmakers locked in the closet
Say we can’t watch them buy the boys drinks
I love you like your soul is my soul
I’ll stay till the end of the world
But the minister ran from the altar
When he found we’re a couple of girls
Tradition can be a real mother
Those weren’t cruise ships in the triangle trade
And the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Know it’s time to make history fade
{chorus} Charlie Manson can legally marry
Any woman that’ll give him the time
Money is nice if it’s decent But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
And handy when push comes to shove Were told that their love is a crime
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Know everything’s lost without love {chorus}
They say Jesus he died for the sinners Yeah, Charlie Manson can legally marry
And he fought so that true love will win Any woman that’ll give him the time
But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers But the two dear sweet lesbian lovers
Were told they should read the small print THEY KNOW THAT THEIR LOVE IS SUBLIME
Being a senior in high school I couldn't ask for better in the way of being me and getting messed with. I did get bullied a ton when I was in middle school for the preconception that I was gay. Later I finally came out my sophomore year with tons of support that I have now. Slowly I started telling more friends and adults along the way. Now I plan to find a organization in the states so I can start making a difference here at home.
College Speech here at my high school has really brought the advocate out in me this year. I have always fought for the community, but with the ability to get a voice to my class, has made it more wild. An informative speech I have been working on currently has me on the bystander effect and bullying. That has kept me busy with me trying to perfect it as much as I can. I want to be the one person for small towns to make a difference while I am still here. Then my nation and ultimately the world.
All in all, whatever I can do, I will do it. I will be the one that makes a difference behind the scenes. No fame needed, just the pride of a job that I go to everyday and love! I love LGBTQIASP individuals more then you will ever know. This is the era of change. Here we come.
well in my place, there are many youths who are LGBT. In our custom, the old people(grandparents) say that its disrespectful to be LGBT. They also say that God only created Adam & Eve to be together so therefore a man and a woman should only be accepted. They say that being a LGBT is like committing a big sin.I kind of agree but I also disagree with that.I believe that people should be with whoever they want to be with. But parents now a days, try and accept their child for who they are whether their lesbian,gay,bisexual, or transgendered because they're afraid if their child commits suicide or do something crazy. Also, there isnt any cases of people gay bashing because when young teens see other LGBT teens, they usually become friends or something like that. they don't do anything harmful to LGBT youths.
in my country same sex marriage is accepted in i think 3-5 states.unfortunately it is not accepted where i reside.in fact, my girlfriend and i have to be very discrete.another word:
'HIDE"! so we are preparing to move to another state.
I would like to point out the contradictory statements found in the ILGA 2008 and 2010 reports entitled "State-Sponsored Homophobia: A world survey of laws prohibiting same sex activity between consenting adults."
In their 2008 report the ILGA states on page 10: "Penal Code of 1996: Article 88: 'Anyone who commits an indecent act or an act against nature with an individual of the same sex will be punished with 1 to 3 years prison and a fine of 100,000 to 500,000 francs.'"
Whereas in the 2010 ILGA report we find on page 44: "Note that same-sex activities never have been criminalised in Benin...."
I am a currently serving US Peace Corps Volunteer in Benin and my supervisors go by the same information found in the ILGA's 2008 report. However, an acquaintance at the US Embassy in Benin seems to believe the law against homosexuality has been repealed as is evidenced by Benin's approval of his and his husband's visas to serve at the US Embassy here as diplomats; their visas were denied by the Cameroonian government when they applied as a married couple to work at the US embassy there. Additionally, an American lesbian diplomat couple's visas were recently approved by the Beninese government and the women will be arriving in the coming weeks. This is progress and indicative of a change in an official change in stance on homosexuality on the part of Benin (and the US State Dept. who fought for these two couples).
Regardless of what is codified, homosexuality here is very unacceptable. The respect for the rule of law in Benin is weak (and weaker the more rural you endeavor) and people cling to traditional customs and often fear strong changes like an acceptance of homosexuality, even though such changes are towards a recognition of basic human rights. Just as in most African countries, Beninese find homosexuality to be a Western phenomenon that might be infiltrating the country but is nonetheless un-African, un-Beninese. However, most Beninese are extremely undereducated and do not know what critical thinking is--let alone how to implement it in their daily lives. Thus, there is hope for homosexuality in Benin, but not until the institution of secular education is strengthened and made free and made as mandatory as for children in the West.
I might add that here in Africa in general but Benin in particular (and Zambia, as my experience there allows me to comment) some men will engage in same sex acts but will not define their acts or themselves as homosexuals. I have even heard of some men seeing only anal penetration as characteristic of homosexuality, but actions less "invasive" are not. Furthermore, Westerners like to attach labels to what they observe. An American who just stepped off the Brussels Air flight will look around and might see a bunch of queer men: men here hold hands as a sign of friendship and will even be quick to call another man beautiful/handsome. The continuum on which an American perceives a person's actions as heterosexual, questionably homosexual, or blatantly homosexual will be different from that of a Beninese continuum with respect to the area in between the two extremes (heteronormative behavior and blatantly homosexual activity).
Regardless of being able to hold hands with another man, hold his waste, and embrace him (here, assuming he is my boyfriend), openly expressing that we are a gay couple would put his and my personal safety at risk; violent reprisal is a real danger.
Benin is in high need of strong willed, well educated, tactful citizens to form an organization without Western leadership (so as to be viewed as more organic) that will conduct outreach to raise awareness about the existence of homosexuals--and their right to exist--and how such a change in cultural views will not entail an eroding of personal values or morals. As I like to say: homophobia exists in Benin, but homophobia does not make a Beninese a Beninese.
Please help each other spread love not hate!
I am begging everyone on this site, everyone that posts here with their stories
Or perhaps comes seeking advice. Please don't hate spread love. We need to unite
As LGBT people! We need to come together. I've read some heartbreaking stories
Of hate and violence towards people on here and my heart breaks. No one should
Be told that they are garbage nor should anyone be treated violently because of their sexual
Orientation. Love your family and friends and cherish each day. You are who you are and we are
All unique individuals and we are all special. Sending everyone hugs. jadesama@gmail.com is my email
Address I want to open my email to other LGBT people so we can help one another
I am new to this but I would love to make friends from around the world and lend some support
To the LGBT community. ( : Feel free to drop me an email!
Hi, I live in US, but I'm an Italian citizen. My partner and I adopted a beautiful baby 22 months ago. Today he is 22 months old, almost 2!
Well, I was trying to get his Italian citizenship for him. I went to the Italian consulate, they received all the papers and 2 months later they said that they can not proceed with his citizenship, because an Italian law from 1983 (Legge 4 maggio 1983 n. 184, art.44). This means, because Italy doesn't accept gay adoption, my son can not be Italian. I'm very frustrated about it. I'm not looking for an adoption in Italy, I just want my son to be Italian as his father. How should I proceed? any thought? I feel this is a discriminatory act, not just with me, but with my son.
2008- Conceptualization of Velvet to create a safe space for LBT community which was absent in kolkata specially. People needed a friendly environment with privacy and security where they can discuss their day to day life and ask for help if needed.
2009- Velvet Facebook group launched. Base shifted to Delhi. More than 300 members joined. Regular nteraction, discussion and exchange of ideas started actively on facebook.
2009- Took part in Delhi Queer Pride 2009
Organized community based programs
Active participation in queer scenario of Delhi
2010- Took part in Delhi Queer pride 2010
2011- Networked with Mumbai queer community actively
Back to kolkata to focus dedicatedly on VELVET along with Alka Kedwal
Actively participated in KOLKATA RAINBOW PRIDE FESTIVAL 2011
Introduced LBT participation in Kolkata Pride walk 2011, 17th july for the
first time.
Velvet Became support group for LGBT
Velvet became recognized by ILGA
Started personalized counseling for LBT community
Started close interaction with Sangini to have them as Mentor to Velvet
Sonali and Alka came out in FEMINA ANNIVERSARY ISSUE 14th October
2011 as lesbian couple
Took part in IBN7 Zindegi Live talk show as Lesbian couple- to be aired on
November 2011
More than a dozen individual ongoing cases handled and still getting requests
everyday.
Creating Network between LGBT community in Kolkata to fight loneliness
among queer population
FUTURE PLANS:
To register Velvet as a trust by January 2012.
To start mainstream activities to build and spread awareness and eliminate Homophobia
I believe this film offers the world a wonderful and motivational look at the gay journey, which few people in the general populace knows exists...but it does! This 32-minute film is available on DVD.
Ed Breeding, Las Cruces, New Mexico, USA
email: breeding4051@comcast.net
www.ed-breeding.artistwebsites.com