I am a 24 yr old male in Saudi Arabia and I have been very very unhappy since i was about 19. I am too afraid to come out. Keeping this to myself my whole life has taken its toll on me, the last 5 years especially. I am getting to a point where I don't even want to be around anyone at all anymore, I hate my life, I hate myself, and most of all I hate being so lonely ALL THE TIME. I know I am still young but ever sense I found out I was gay I had to hide it, which in the long run has turned me into a meaningless empty shell, I feel dead inside. It's just getting to be too much......I don't know what to do.

As a gay person that lived in Canada for about 7 years I can see why lots of gay people in Saudi are lost you never know what to do people keep asking when are you going to get married and have kids it just makes me feel that getting married is going to solve all the problems which is not true at all
I have tried to get back to Canada with no help at all not even from the Canadian embassy
Everything has to be a secret finding someone that you can talk to or even someone that you can share good moments and feelings with is totally hard
Not knowing what to do or what to say keeping everything inside is just not the answer
I am still trying to find way to be able to leave this country and live in a place where I can be free and be judged by my options or even the way I look and express myself

I want to tell all the world these word " I am so sorry for my mom and dad about all the wrong that I made in my life. I am so sorry for being a gay and you were waiting long time to see me married.
I also make apology on Youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MpRF5fBfORc

Sam, I don't know what to tell. But we are really in damn trouble where nobody can help. Gay life in Saudi Arabia is depending on secret and that's really what make me all the time so angry. I cannot tell me family or my best friends because if I really did no one will accept me. I am wondering how will I live the rest of my life. I am 25 years old and I will carry my secret until whatever...

I am gay who live in this damn country which is Saudi Arabia. I always felt no happy, I could not have sex with gay at all, because if i really want to do it, I will be executed from this life. I don't know why we don't have right just for protection? This is my body, whatever I did that's only representing me? Every gay or lesbian wants to have freedom in this life, where in fact Saudi Arabia law kill these people? am I really murder? do I really deserve to die because that I am gay or for somebody who is lesbian. At the end, I will truly tell everyone that I and some of my friends who are gay thinking to attempt suicide and you know why?

Abdullah, I am so sorry , I really know your feeling. It's just the same that I and most of the gays who live in Saudi Arabia. I think that we will live our life just like what it is? No one will understand what we are feeling about? Also, do not hate yourself, and make sure that you have good friends especially gay friends in order to understand each other.

best of luck.

you know im like you guys but i never gave up i never said i cant live my life the way i want it so i said to myself: if you really want to live the life you want heres my epic secret plan i will stay in the school until i finsh it and go to britian to study computer science/game devlopment (its what i want) and then when i go there i cut contact with everyone i know in saudi arabia it will be extermely hard but for me i think its worth it i am not going to get married by damn force i'd rather die than get married to a women that i didnt even see or have any idea about her and you know if this fails i will just live alone in saudi arabi till the day i die or kill myself but the main reason i said game devlopment its not like i am obessed about it its because we dont have any game studios in saudi arabia saw the point so i can get a reasonable nationalty as britian and work there, if you cant do this come up with something mine is sacrificing everything and i am willing to do it

COULD GAYS snd LESBIANS MARRY EACHOTHER? they could fool everyone this way but still get to live their lives. It is not fair for gays and lesbians that just quietly want to live their lives. If marriage must be forced, could a gay man make an arrangement with a lesbian to get married and tell his family they will marry. Then the husband and wife can openly allow their gay and lesbian 'friends' come and stay at their home. This seems like a nice solution to get the constraints of society off their backs.

Hi , I'm Gay and I live in Saudi Arabia , it's to hard to begin gay and Muslim in that place , so no one know that I'm gay , If they found that I'm gay they will kill me , most of guys here are bisexual , so I fall in love with a man how betrayed me and he told some of my friends about me after that they didn't talk to me , all I want in this time is get out from Saudi Arabia and Recourse to any country that respects the rights of gays . sorry because my English langue is bad , if can help me contact with me on skype : sosoXman