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The Your Stories section is all about you! Please take a minute to tell visitors of the ILGA website about what LGBTI life is like in reality. Please submit your personal story and share your experience!

YOUR STORIES
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Readers Experiences

This is what people are saying about life for LGBTI people in NIGERIA...
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(user currently living in UNITED KINGDOM) posted for gay lesbian transgender bisexual readers on 12/07/2012
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It is assumed that being straight is the only acceptable way of life. How they got it wrong!
LGBT people do exist in the society; all they need is the right support and environment to identify openly. Unfortunately the State is prohibity homosexuality, so who is going to help LGBTs?
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(user currently living in NIGERIA) posted for gay lesbian transgender bisexual intersex straight readers on 26/12/2011 +0
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Attn: sir/ma

we are a non governmental association in care for the gay and lesbian right in Nigeria. right now we are really going thru a lot of challenges via the band of gay and lesbian right in our country and this has result to so many killings of our brothers and sisters in the north side of the country..
right now we are hiding under the shadow of this association Doctor Uwa Foundation for the gay and lesbian but we can not come out openly bcus right now our life is not save.
we are writing you this mail so that u can use your able network to inform others what we have been facing in our country Nigeria and if you have any advise you can send to us pls we will really welcome it urgently.
pls you can reach our foundation thru this:

Doctor Uwa Foundation
for the gay and lesbian right
5,oyetola street,
mafoluku oshodi,
lagos, nigeria
west african
Tel:2348033924579

pls we will urgently be waiting for your respond and help
to enable us help our brothers and sister in the north side
of our country to enable us save there life..
we will send you some of the killings picture of some of our member
that was killed trying to run for there life.

pls your urgent respond is highly needed.

regards
Doctor Keven Uwa
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(user currently living in NIGERIA) posted for gay lesbian readers on 13/12/2011 +3
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If you have been monitoring situations in Nigeria, you will understand that a bill originally designed to outlaw gay marriage is in the pipeline in the country. Gay sex stands the risk of being banned in Nigeria. Gays and lesbians face open discrimination and abuse in a country divided by Christians and Muslims who almost uniformly oppose homosexuality. In the areas in Nigeria's north where Islamic Shariah law has been enforced for about a decade, gays and lesbians can face death by stoning.
Under the proposed law to be passed by Senate, couples who marry could face up to 14 years each in prison. Witnesses or anyone who helps couples marry could be sentenced to 10 years behind bars. The bill also punishes the "public show of same-sex amorous relationships directly or indirectly'' with ten years in prison. A newly added portion of the bill, leveling 10 years in prison for those found guilty of organizing, operating or supporting gay clubs, organizations and meetings, worries advocates in Nigeria.
Efforts made by some international organizations seem to be falling on deaf ears. It is against this backdrop that the under listed people who are professionals and activists of various works of life in the different states of the federation wish to step up the fight against this bill which we have all described as an infringement on the fundamental human rights of the Nigerian citizen.
Under the auspices of Gay advocacy Nigeria, we intend to tackle the bill by secretly lobbying our various House of Representatives and members of the Senate in our various constituencies to frustrate the full passage of the bill. We are sure that our efforts will yield positive results since we have in the past influenced similar bills that were passed in our favour.
However, we are constrained by finance since this involves a huge consultation and lobbying. We therefore appeal to your organization to assist us with some finances that will facilitate our objective. It is our desire to keep this effort a top secret until the results start coming. We therefore hope that this letter will be given the utmost confidentiality it deserves. From time to time we shall be giving adequate report to your organization on the way forward and if need be, invite some of your members over where we shall introduce you to the various honourable members.
Believing that this letter will be treated with the urgency it requires. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours partners in the struggle;
Shaapera Donatus Terfa, Cordinator, Benue State
Ajayi yomi Ogun State
Osas Theophilus Edo State
Felicia Asui Delta State
Badmus Damkor Cross River State
Wugak Manji Plateau State
John Thomas Bayelsa State
Judith Akura Kogi State
Danladi Aminu Kano
Osagie Onus Akwa Ibom State
Emeka Chinedu Enugu State
Damilola Adekunle Oyo State
Chukwuma Chikelo Abia State
Tricia Anebi Osun State
Mustapha Abubakar Jigawa State
Dooshima Anyam Nasarawa State
Dior IOrkor Tararba State
Mary doo Ukange Bauchi State
Aminu Biu Borno State
Chinasa Eze Anambra State
Ben Igboko Imo State
Patricia Alongu Lagos State
Aluma Theodore Abuja FCT.
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ADEYINKA CARTWAK (user currently living in NIGERIA) posted for gay lesbian bisexual readers on 05/05/2011 tagged with lgbt families, hate crime and violence prevention, human rights, laws and leadership , sexual orientation, illegality of male to male relationships +28
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On the 12th of jan 2011, a day before the PDP Primaries, PUNCH newspaper published an interview with the Gay Association of Nigeria {the interview was done on the 11th at a hotel in Abuja}. The interview in question, was done by some executive members of the Association but a whole lot of members turned up for support.... During the interview, Vikky labbele stated when he was asked who 'GAN' will support for primaries and said ALHAJI ATIKU. He said the association will support Atiku because he is father/businessman and an understanding person who they believe can make Nigeria better. He never said Atiku was gay. He further stated that GAN, like any other association has rights to declare support for who ever they want like its done in developed countries around the world. That said interview generated a lot of controversy and was believed to be cause of Atiku's downfall during the presidential primaries because he lost the primaries woefully. The issue at hand now is that Atiku loyalist have vowed to seek every member of GAN out dispose them....... As i write this report now, The SSS are on the tail of the members of GAN who are already on the run from Atiku's loyalist {the loyalist have murdered 2 members as at the 29th}. All the executive and most members of GAN are on the run for their lives.
The question now is that, How long will we keep running, What will happen to our jobs and houses since we are in no position to trust anybody? The said interview can be checked online on http://www.punchng.com/Archive.aspx?datex=01%2F12%2F2011 . This is an SOS call. On easter monday, three houses in three different locations belonging to some members was burnt down. How long do we have to endure this torture? Adeyinka is currently the project director for Gay Association of Nigeria and he is creator of 'Nigerian gay lesbian bisexual lovers and friends on facebook. https://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=154681804546033. Adeyinka can be reached on adeyinkacartwak@yahoo.com
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(user currently living in NIGERIA) posted for gay lesbian bisexual readers on 05/05/2011 tagged with human rights, sexual orientation, illegality of male to male relationships +20
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On the 12th of jan 2011, a day before the PDP Primaries, PUNCH newspaper published an interview with the Gay Association of Nigeria {the interview was done on the 11th at a hotel in Abuja}. The interview in question, was done by some executive members of the Association but a whole lot of members turned up for support.... During the interview, Vikky labbele stated when he was asked who 'GAN' will support for primaries and said ATIKU. He said the association will support Atiku because he is father/businessman and understanding person who they believe can make Nigeria better. He never said Atiku was gay. He further stated that GAN can like any other association has rights to declare support for who ever they want like its done in developed countries around the world. That said interview generated a lot of controversy and was believed to be cause of Atiku's downfall because he lost the primaries woefully. The issue at hand now is that Atiku loyalist have vowed to seek every member of GAN out dispose them....... As i write report now, The SSS are on the tail of the members who are already on the run from Atiku's loyalist {they have murdered 2 members as at the 29th}. All the executive and most members of GAN are on the run for their lives.
The question now is that, How long will we keep running, What will happen to our jobs and houses since we are in no position to trust anybody? The said interview can be checked online on http://www.punchng.com/Archive.aspx?datex=01%2F12%2F2011 . Thhis write up is written by Adeyinka Cartwak. Adeyinka is currently the project director for Gay Association of Nigeria and he is creator of 'Nigerian gay lesbian bisexual lovers and friends on facebook. https://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=154681804546033. Adeyinka can be reached on adeyinkacartwak@yahoo.com
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I was in Nigeria in Summer of 2009. I had a fantastic time there. The social life of lesbians was mostly visible in Abuja and Lagos. I was moving in circles of upper and middle class individuals so I cannot speak wider than this. The reactions I got from men were of a highly sexualized nature. Some of them found it arousing in the sense that they say lesbians as sexually adventurous and had high hopes for a threesome. This, I found offensive. Even more offensive was a discussion I had with a guy who told me of how he attended a party with many lesbians in Abuja. He was particularly hostile when he spoke of butch lesbians or girls who chose butch lesbians as sexual partners. He insinuated that he would support anyone who took the liberty of "correcting their sexual practices" i.e. rape or coerced sex.

Aside from that, I could not hold hands with my girlfriend in public or even dare to sneak a kiss but in the elitist clubs it was all well and good and no one batted an eyelid.
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Akudo O. (user currently living in NIGERIA) posted for lesbian readers on 21/08/2010 tagged with at the work place, hate crime and violence prevention, sexual orientation, illegality of female to female relationships +24
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I started work with my present organization in February 2007, i was their first employee and was placed on a very little salary because at that point the company had not started generating money. When we got our first contract, i worked weekends alone with the Managing Director, sometimes, when i close, i get called out again to work at night.

Later that Year, two tech guys that were so nice to me till date and a lady was employed under me, and then another two ladies, till we became 20 in the office. We worked amicably until the Managers started being intimate with the female employees. I didn't care because i always wear my engagement ring from my partner which they all guessed must be a man.

At a point, they started rumoring that my friends on Facebook are mostly girls and that i chat with only girls, i did not bother. When they talk about their boyfriends, i move away because i dont want anybody to want to hear my story.

The MD called me one evening after close of work that he wanted to visit my house. I lied that i was living with my sister, and there he promised to give me rent to move out of my sisters house so that he will be coming to eat our native soup in my house.

I kept hiding from him, until he shocked me with questions about my sexuality. I lied, (because of the rate of discrimination and stigmatization in my country)yet he demoted me and always make reference of me in meetings although without mentioning my name, yet everyone knows who he is always referring to.

Right now, i have been given a dress code, for only me and also warned that i should never be in contact with any female agent working under me and the most painful part is that the people i employed are now my bosses.

I have learnt a lot my self and i have vowed to embrace being an activist to make sure nobody ever experiences what i have. I working towards making my name while still here so that they will know that the stone that was rejected can become the chief corner stone.
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