Baja California Mexico - When I first started visiting Mexico, I thought, oh... too Catholic... too Macho... too straight. And for the casual visitor, that is the image. Soon someone took me by the hand and opened my eyes! Long story short is that my first impression was wrong in so many ways.

It is significant I think that Mexico never went through the Victorian, Puritan, Calvinist eras as we in the Anglo-Saxon world. They don't have the same hang-ups we do about same mentoring relationships that include sex as many other parts of the world. It is not uncommon for a young Mexican man to have same-sex relations simply as a learning experience. Note that I say "Mexican man." As tolerant as I have found Mexicans to be... don't mess with their kids. That is one thing that will bring certain wrath. In some parts of Mexico having a gay son is prized.... because they know he will be there in their old age, while all the other sons get married and move away.

At first I was a part-time visitor in Mexico. Now I am a full-time resident and live pretty openly with my partner. I say "pretty openly" because while we respect other's boundaries and don't push the gay thing, they know, we live comfortably and participate publicly as a couple. "They" includes the Mexicans and the local foreign resident crowd.

Northern Baja is a great place for gay retired couples... there are many senior gays living here quietly. Sunny beaches with ocean front houses at a fraction of what it would cost 45 minutes north in the US. And if we really need to go home, it is a short ride to the border.

Being right in Tijuana, close to the border, is not so good for gringos, or anyone for that matter... but it is where the clubs are, and there are several fun and interesting gay bars, clubs, etc. and once you know your way around they are fun to visit. We go out... usually when friends visit... 3-4 times a year.

Because we can be open, we try to live as an example for younger Mexicans who may not have many male role models. We try to show them that being gay does not mean that one partner is the "man"
and the other is the "woman." We show them that living their lives normally as gay men is possible.

We have marched through the streets of Tijuana and Ensenada in Gay Pride celebrations. Interesting experience! We run a free yahoo group where we distribute information and try to build a little community. Mexicans are not big on "organization" so that is another area where we mentor. Check us out at: http://www.groups.yahoo.com/group/MexicoGay-BajaGay I can answer any questions there.

For anyone interested in learning how to brush up your spanish speaking skills, I recommend an immersion school in Cuernavaca, with a GLBT specific program. You can stay in GLBT homes, or GLBT friendly homes. The summer program includes an overnight in Mexico City, and participation in the Gay Pride march there... an amazing experience! www.CETLALIC.org.mx

Many will think "Mexico?" and frown. It's not for everyone. But for those who enjoy Latin culture and adventure, it can be a viable option, and very economical for those with inquisitive and open minds.